Well as promised, I am talking about moving forward from anger in this post. Yes I said I would do it tomorrow, but I can't sleep and well, here it is.
I have been angry for 4 days now, I don't mean a little upset. I mean so angry that I can't focus on anything else for 4 days. Angry enough to take it out on people who didn't even know why I was angry. I came to a realization as I was cooking my dinner tonight, I don't even know the people I am angry at. I needed to decide why I was angry, and move on. So many times we get mad and really don't know why we are really mad. I am mad not at this one situation, or even about the thing that started it. I am mad because all my life I have always allowed other people to make me feel like they wanted me to. I am mad that I let someone else make me second guess who I was. I am livid that I allowed someone to make me second guess my worth as a human being. Ok, so now I have analyzed myself, I know why I am angry, now what amd I going to do about it.
I have to make a clear plan to move on, and get over this anger at others and at myself. It is more than just making a choice to move on. You have to really make an effort, and that is where I am at right now. I know I am a good, but flawed person, and I am worth just as much as anyone else. I have to just leave all of the reminders of my anger in the dust and focus on me and what is good for me. Having so much anger inside me is not good for me, it makes me a crazy obcessive mess. I am not perfect, but I am a good mom to a child who would not be on this earth if it weren't for my husband and I. I am not the best, but I am a good loving wife to a husband who doesn't always remember that he is suppose to cherish me. I am surely no Celine Dion, but I am a pretty good singer. I am funny, and have alot to offer the world, so I am moving on.
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